Lisa VanZandt is just starting her kindle publishing journey. Her first book is The Subway Is for Unicorns: A Postmodern, Magical Realist, Sacrilegious Comedy, Adventure, and Romance. It is available on kindle. Her second book (now published under her real name, Lisa Zoetewey) Please Understand Me: A Patient's Perspective on Psychosis and Its Treatment, is now available on kindle as well. Her third book, Dear Butterfly: A Collection of Magical and Mythical Poems, was released to kindle July 6, 2018. She also has a short story, "Into My Heart with Jesus", a sequel to The Subway Is for Unicorns, which is available for free when you click here.
The Subway Is for Unicorns: A Postmodern, Magical Realist, Sacrilegious Comedy, Adventure, and Romance
is full of surprises!
It’s the end times. God is on vacation in Bermuda. Jesus aka Bill is a clown.
Lisa is a mental patient with schizoaffective disorder, a stripper, an ascended master, President of the United States, Satan’s ex-wife, God’s replacement, and the author of this book. She’s got the hots for Jesus.
Satan is Santa Claus and is trying to gain dominion over the world, if Lisa doesn’t do it first.
Join Lisa and Jesus and their off and on romance as they slay jabberwockies, seek enlightenment, save the souls in hell, and try to stop Satan from gaining dominion.
The stakes are high. If Lisa and Jesus fail to stop Satan, God will destroy the world. If they succeed, they could lose each other.
This novella blends the author’s real delusions, experiences, and imagination to create a magical world of shifting realities filled with unicorns, angels, leprechauns, clowns, vampires, ascended masters, Martians, bag ladies, jabberwockies and much more.
Be transported to the heights of craziness in this hilarious and sexy comedy, adventure, and romance.
And there's more to come.
Please Understand Me: A Patient’s Perspective on Psychosis and Its Treatment
provides insights you can use to improve patients' lives.
Lisa Zoetewey (who also writes under the pen name Lisa VanZandt) has been hospitalized involuntarily in three different institutions. She understands that most caregivers do not know what it is like to be in a psychiatric patient’s shoes.
Involuntary treatment can be traumatic. It’s normal to feel unsafe in the ward and threatened by anyone who dismisses or contradicts the patient’s delusions. It seems like everyone is trying to control the patients, forcing them to take medication and monitoring their behavior and blaming them for actions that under normal circumstances would be considered inappropriate. But these aren't normal circumstances.
Lisa explains why a patient would want to go off medication and explores the consequences of being labelled “mentally ill.” She discusses when and who to tell about the patient’s illness. She provides suggestions as to how to handle patients better.
One recurring theme is the recommendation to focus on how the patient is feeling and how you can make them feel better, even if the solutions you end up using may be unconventional.
Please Understand Me provides compelling insights into one patient’s experience with psychosis and its treatment, insights you can use to better care for your loved ones and patients.
Dear Butterfly: A Collection of Magical and Mythical Poems
introduces you to enchanting places and characters.
If a pen wants to write a poem, who am I
to deny it? Who am I
to deny ink of sky that is concentrated
black or blue depending
on the time of day? Who am I
to deny the thickened rainbows that
have so been contained into instruments
of moonlight and twisted earth?
Lisa VanZandt doesn't deny her pens the pleasure of poetry.
Visit a city where everyone looks alike.
Visit the labyrinth where the minotaur was slain.
Read letters to the butterfly who became the sun from the elf who loved him.
Listen to Narcissus's reflection speak.
Meet someone who borrows a ghost's chains.
Encounter Christ carrying his cross in a supermarket.
Go to the edge of the woods with the children whose parents sold them to the trees.
Listen to Goldsmith, the Village Idiot, give excuses for the strange things he does.
Join the angels riding trains without their wings.
Go camping at Tri Ponds and in the Rocky Mountain wilderness.
Explore magical places and mythical characters with Lisa VanZandt in her new collection of poetry!
Get your free copy of:
"Into My Heart with Jesus"
All is not well in heaven.
Souls' happy endings are unraveling. Some souls have disappeared. Even Jesus has gone missing.
In this comical short story, a sequel to The Subway Is for Unicorns, Lisa and Fred team up to find Jesus and set things right in heaven.
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